Knock knock... anybody there?

Hooray the season of floral abundance begins!

Where have I been? I have no idea. Life has been pretty good  as far as lives go. I think I just needed a little time to catch up with myself.  We are settling comfortably into the new digs, the "Bearded One" is working his magic around the yard, the farm paper project is finally done,  next week's art walk is quickly approaching and i think I've figured out what pieces "de art" to feature. The plan thus far, is to have five matted pieces in the window display area and  a framed piece featured on an easel inside the store. Olympia Supply (a hardware store) is sponsoring me which is great because I'm always taking photos of " bits and pieces". 

We went to home depot yesterday and I found myself overwhelmed in the midst of all the annuals and perennials. It's the middle of April and yet here were all the summer pot stuffers out in full force making me feel like I was behind in the planting process. Is it me or do they just keep getting earlier and earlier? The trouble with full summer pots at this time of the season is that they will peter out before summer is in full swing. I will have to pace myself and not be afraid that there won't be any available plants later on in the season. Of course there won't be any but that's beside the point... right? Arghhhhh. I need a greenhouse so I can be my own supplier. We picked up a few cool season veggie starts for the square foot garden which always feels like cheating... back to needing a greenhouse (sigh) and a lovely red geranium for me to gaze at through the sliding glass door.

The Bearded One planting our "Square foot" crops while working on his spring tan

The neighbor's are ahead of the game and already have their porch pots hanging. 

Neighbor's porch with hanging baskets

I love my front porch and am looking forward to sitting on it in the evening as the summer progresses. It gets the morning sun until about noon and then is in shade whereas the neighbor's is the opposite. Their porch gets morning shade and then late afternoon sun. I had envisioned red geranium baskets with bacopa and lobelia but I'm not sure if early sun is enough.

Well I'm going to get out and enjoy this lovely spring day and maybe work on my "farmer tan".

 

The following are examples of a few currently well known farmer tans…

Cyclist farmer’s tan – a nice, scintillating tan covering the arms and legs where a jersey top and bottom serve as the defining pattern line. All cyclists and triathletes should strive for this standard. The darker the tan lines on your leg the more seasoned rider you are.

Sock farmer’s tan – a bitchen tan line created by socks that go above the ankles. This tan line is shown only when you don’t wear socks, but it still looks like you’re wearing socks because of the tan line. A classic!

Raccoon eyes (also a member of the farmer’s tan family) – a cool tan line that develops when the sun is reflected off of the snow while you’re wearing goggles or sunglasses. Note: special preventative actions need to be taken if you called in sick to work and are returning the next day.

Hat farmer’s tan – a great tan line that occurs when you wear your hat and the sun tans everything except for the top portion of your forehead. A good example: Tiger Woods.

HR monitor strap farmer’s tan – another awesome tan line meticulously sculpted by your heart rate monitor chest strap and developed outside without your shirt on. Note: this tan line takes some time to build up so be patient, but once you achieve it, it will serve you for a long time.

Watch farmer’s tan (or GPS farmer’s tan) – also a classic, occurs by being outside and always wearing your wrist watch/GPS. A fun joke is to take off your watch and ask someone what time it is while looking at your watch tan! It is usually more funny to you than anyone else!

Race day farmer’s tan – a relatively new tan to the family but this one usually goes away after a few weeks because of its nature. It occurs during half and full Ironman events because of the time required out in the sun the day of your race. Whatever shape jersey you are wearing that day will be the outline of this pattern. Sunscreen protection is difficult on race days because of how many elements breakdown its protection, so be prepared because this one comes whether you like it or not.

Sandal farmer’s tan – another bitchen shape that follows the direction your sandals take to connect to your toes. A good Sandal tan takes longer to achieve because of the tender nature of the skin covering the top of your feet. However, when this tan is achieved and has a rugged, dark base its glory shines through for all to see!

If you have had any of the farmer tan styles above, you’ve experienced the personal satisfaction gained from your tanning achievements. Words cannot express nor describe the feeling of a solid farmer’s tan.

The next time you accidentally expose a portion of your arm or leg that has never seen the light of day, proudly look beyond that stunning brightness and find that crisp, defining line where the darkness begins. This is where two worlds collide, good vs evil. This is your farmer’s tan. Fertilize, grow, and culture this tan line, then proudly harvest it for everyone to see.

Written by Dave Platfoot